Taste in Provo: a compliment despite my best efforts

I have never been kind to Provo. I have no intentions of changing my attitude or moving there ever, but gosh darn-it if Provo doesn’t keep serving me up surprises.

Good surprises.

Not that I recommend anyone visit that city, but if you do, go to Taste.

They make, and sell, chocolate. Good chocolate.

Surrounded by pseudo French styled decor you can sidle up to the bar for an $8 chocolate and balsamic tasting. Or you could spend just a touch more for afternoon tea, Friday night chocolate and cheese pairings, or, because of where you are, non-alcoholic wine.

I am a bottom dweller so I ponied up 8 bucks.

For that I got a square of 6 different chocolates, 3 balsamics , and a taste of the stuff Nutella is trying to be. The chocolatier explained as we went a long what it was we were eating and the process of its production.By far the best was called Karamelizalt Levendulaviragok Csillaganizsos Tejcsokoladeban. Those are real words. I didn’t make that up. This stuff won a silver medal at the Academy of Chocolate and it is the only milk chocolate I like- because it also has caramelized lavender and anise- and my heart. It also has my heart.What I walked away with is this stuff made in Portland called Pok Pok Som. It is a drinking vinegar with ginger and I think I swooned.

Swooned? In Provo?

Aw-shucks.

Sea of Sweet: I have no idea what that stuff is but it works

So there is this place in Rancho Cucamonga, CA (yes that is an actual place), where all diets go to die.I would describe it as a middle eastern creperie that specializes in calories. Like, Olympic levels of calories.

The place looks harmless, like some suburban strip mall afterthought, but do not be fooled. The Nutella double chocolate Twix crepe will send you to a joyful early grave.

But that is just for the average “I want extra helpings of the sugar I know” palate. They have other stuff too. For instance, if you want to overdose in calories derived from things that should otherwise be healthy, you can indulge in any one of their fruit cocktails.

This thing took ten days to build, not because they are slow, but because the guy behind the counter just kept stuffing things into that glass.

Then there is this stuff I had never heard about called “ashta”. I would describe it as something in between heavy cream and cottage cheese. Apparently it can be turned into ice cream, like a less-sweet vanilla, and then be piled on top of a crepe then sprinkled with rose water, then dusted with pistachio and then drowned in honey, then devoured by me.

I saw behind the counter they have baklava, and dates, and every combination of phyllo dough stuffed with sweet stuff imaginable and I want all of it.

It is a bad thing that I found this place. Curse you JJ. Curse you.

Donut Friend: your new BFF

The first thing you should know about Donut Friend, is when they are open. Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, and Sunday; 7am-10pm. Friday and Saturday they are open 7am to midnight. You need to know this because no matter where you live, you need to go to Donut Friend and it would be a shame to get there and find the doors locked.

Not that I know anyone who has ever done that, I’m just sayin’.

Once you are there, and they are open, you order just about anything you could ever want. They may even have things you didn’t know you wanted, but once you see it, now you want it.

For instance, we all know that we want a traditional donut filled with lime cream, topped with vanilla glaze and graham cracker crumbs. What I didn’t know I wanted was cream cheese, strawberry jam, and fresh basil inside a traditional donut, topped with vanilla glaze and balsamic reduction.

I’m a sucker for balsamic reduction.

Should you want to create your own concoction, you can. Not only can you, but the staff, at lest the ones who were there when I went, every time I have “went”, has been the sort of helpful folks who appear to like what they are doing when they are serving you sugary cakes topped with maple glaze and bacon.

Who wouldn’t be happy serving that?

I know, I know, vegetarians wouldn’t be happy serving that. But not to fear, if one is not only vegetarian but vegan, they got options for you too.

I do say “you” because I am not one. But some of my best friends are. Like Donut Friend. Donut Friend is one of my best vegan friends.

These plants are not donuts, they are decor. They have decor because they are located in Highland Park, which is newly cool, and to fit in you must have decor.