I had a bike once. Not an expensive or fancy one, but it was pretty much exactly what I wanted. It appears someone else appreciated my taste in bikes enough to steal mine while it was resting on my front porch.
I want another bike.
Simple, fixed gear, no embellishments, I liked it. I have no intentions of completing a triathlon or riding in a pelaton, but I expect the bike to work well enough to ride.
Now should Santa want to upgrade just a little perhaps there are some other options…
A Brooks saddle and toe clips would be welcome.
A rack complete with a wool blanket (refer to previous blanket post) and some chrome accents… also acceptable.
Really, if I’m completely honest, I want a carbon fiber lightweight frame in matte black, no stickers or logos. I want black wall slick tires, only a front brake, preferably disk, fixed gear, chrome seat post and handle bars, natural leather saddle and grips.
I also want a 1960’s Ford Bronco.
Brohammas 
Are these more recent posts copied from the notes to Santa on your refrigerator or does Mrshammas read your blog?