Brohammas Answers the Call To Sea

 

Captain Brohammas aboard the Aquidneck, Newport, RI

She has been calling me for a few years now.  Maybe it is the romance of it, maybe its my penchant for the color navy blue, or maybe the sound in my ears is the same sound all modern males hear as they are stuffed behind a desk with a trip to the water cooler being the closest thing to an adventure we can hope for. 

Shall we be men of action, or shall we push pencils by day and sail sofas by eve?  I say we hoist sails… and thanks to a chance walk past a ticket booth advertising $27 for a two hour tour, I did. 

Just in case I fall overboard and then forget which boat I fell off of.

We did not go all the way round the island, nor even touch one of the seven seas, but we did have fun.  There were three in the crew, seven of us passengers total, and none were amused at my Gilligan’s Island references or my rendition of the theme song. 

I felt a bit like a kid in Huck Finn as I "had fun" helping hoist the sails.

So, hoist up the John B sails, See how the main sail sets...

Once out of the docks, with the sails set and motor cut, we were left with the sound of splashing water and wind in canvas.  Working for little more than tips, the crew answered questions, laughed at our jokes, and did quite well at knowing when we wanted to be entertained or left alone. 

A proper demonstration of the Captain Morgan pose.

That was our Captain. No, not the one at the wheel, the one IN the sail.

Newport is home to America’s premier yacht racing teams.  As we floated about we had the pleasure of watching some professionals in boats worth more than my whole block, demonstrate the art of sailing. 

This vessel is named "Speedboat" despite it being a sailboat. There was no skier behind it, but there could have been.

Those sails are not tin-foil, they are kevlar.

 We were in no hurry to get anywhere, but despite our efforts to do as little as possible, we did manage to steal someone’s wind, argue about the Eagles and Steelers, and win a game of chicken with a tug boat. 

How I really spent my time.

Let the game of chicken begin.

The Madeleine.

Both crew and passengers were a surprisingly pleasant bunch.  When another passenger posed behind the wheel for the obligatory photo-op, I decided to do the same.  Of course I could not just stand there and smile, I had to say, “hold up.  This is Newport!  Let me do my Vanderbilt.”  As you can see by the reaction of the real sailor, this joke was more original than I anticipated.

My kids are hams... where do they get it?

I have now heard the call.  I hope to answer it again soon.

Stars and Stripes atop the mast.